If God is God, and God is, shouldn’t we think that God might actually be able to help us? Shouldn’t we have the courage to engage God with our doubt and disappointment instead of suppressing it or isolating ourselves in it? Do we have the drive to say to God, “I don’t understand!” Or “I’m mad!” Or “That’s not right!” Or “I thought you loved me?!” Or “Why do ask this of me?” Or “I don’t get it!” Or “I don’t know where you are, God!”
Because my daughter believes I love her and that I’m able to help her, she will engage me when she doesn’t understand something. Sometimes she’s polite, sometimes she’s not as polite. But I would sure rather have her engage me than pretend that everything was okay and neglect to grow deeper with me… or than to think that she should deal with her frustration by herself and distance herself from me.
A true faith, I believe, engages God with all we’ve got… even if we are weak in faith… even if we are struggling… We bring it to God. A true faith admits to God that we don’t understand something that we believe to be true. It’s ironic. Doubt and disappointment is largely based on faith. A true faith, in the midst of suffering, says “God, I believe you are loving and you are powerful and that you know what’s going on! That’s what I believe! But God, I don’t know why you don’t seem to be doing anything! And that’s why I’m disappointed!” A true faith engages with God… and believes in God by wrestling with God… it does not pretend… it doesn’t retract… A true faith trusts God enough to engage God with even our doubt and disappointment.